Batman's play school
by The-Red-Lip
Summary: Damian and Dick wind up in an abandoned toy factory. Damian learns about being a child, and the importance of play school. Damian centric! Professor Pyg! Damian Wayne, Robin. Dick Grayson, batman WARNING! Inclides song parody of "play school" being sung by a horrified child.


HEY GUYS!  
I made this a couple of months ago, whilst we were in recess and my bestie and I were singing deranged versions of Childhood songs. Thus, I created a seriously F#$ ed up play school parody.

So...I thought of this!

* * *

Damian had been having a bad day

Firstly, he had to go to school.

Then he was expected to tolerate Grayson's constant interruptions during his training hours. "Come on little D. Have a childhood!" he had said

HE DID HAVE A CHILDHOOD

And lastly! He was forced to endure the HOURS of television torture known as...

Play School.

So, now... As he was walking through the lair of Professor Pyg, to keep himself occupied, he was debating the very existence and purpose of such an idiotic television program. He eventually came to the conclusion that the show was nothing but a bogus front for masking the horrors of the world to the weak-minded and dim-witted populous.

As Robin walked around the empty warehouse he heard a young voice, belonging to a little girl, singing a newly-familiar tune.

(*play school theme music*)

 _"There's a body in there,_

 _In an electrical chair._

 _There are people on chains!_

 _...Disembodied as well_

 _OPEN WIDE!_

 _GUTS OUTSIDE!_

 _It's Pyg's lair"_

Damian followed the sound of the voice until he reached the opposite side of the building. He heard shouts and distressed grunts, coming from a room with a door that was slightly ajar.

Damian ran into the room and his eyes widened in shock.

Bodies.

Typically, he wouldn't have any reaction towards a pile of the dead, being someone who had previously made one of his own and all. But... this was different. It was plain inhumane. Although the league had taught him nearly every possible way to kill someone, they also taught him to have honour.

There was no honour for the people who were now dead in that room.

There were arms and legs spread about everywhere. Heads that were missing bodies, and vice versa. Eyeballs were out of their sockets and were displayed in jars on surgical tables and shelves.

Men.

Women.

 _CHILDREN!_

Just then, his training kicked in. He had to get his head in the game. Grayson.. Batman was in the corner, fighting Pyg. And the bodies...

He counted 14 bodies. 15 people were reported missing. They were missing one.

Robin was pulled out of his mindspace when he heard a small whimpering sound. Sometime whilst he was thinking, Batman had defeated and tied up Pyg. Robin watched as he moved across the room towards a pink frilly lump in the corner.

The scene before him was... Something.

Batman was sitting cross-legged on the floor, holding the yellow lump... a little girl in a tattered yellow dress. He moved her so that he was she was comfortable in his lap. She was no more then five years old. She had a medium tan, curly black hair in pigtails and bright brown crying eyes.

She looked Latina.

That was the ONE thing that all of the bodies had in common. They were picked at random. Had no connection with each other, never having met. Except for ONE detail.

All of the victims were of Hispanic descent.

That animal. That PIG was collecting them for slaughter.

And it made Damian furious!

All of this horror, just because people LOOKED different! Pyg had wanted to end the contamination of Gotham.

It made him furious enough that he was willing to go and end the bastard laying unconscious on the floor at his feet.

...That's exactly what he was going to do.

"He removed his sword from the hidden compartment in his cape... he raised his arms... he counted to three

But then in he heard it.

it started as a mumble.

 **" _There's a bear in there"_ ,**

 **"And a chair as well..."**

And slowly it grew louder.

 **"There are people with games,"**

 **"And stories to tell."**

The little girl's crying became less and less, she was looking at Batman with hopeful eyes.

 **''Open wide, come inside!''**

The melody continued

 ** _'' It's play school!''_**

Only when he heard the little girl quietly giggle, from hearing the sound of Grayson's out-of-pitch singing of the Play School theme song, did he finally understand... The point to all the childish games that Grayson made him play.

It wasn't just a worthless pastime.

It was for fun, for joy, for peace... All of the things that he was denied in the league.

It was there as a reminder. To prove that there was still hope in the world... In Gotham. For if DAMIAN of all people could have a childhood and have FUN. Anyone could.

Damian slipped his sword back into his cape holster.

Maybe, just maybe. He would give Grayson's games, a chance.

Growing up his mother had only offered him the FINEST teachers. Only the best for her perfect boy, "for he will be the best.'' They would say.

He had A LOT to learn about childhood. But Grayson would be a fine tutor...

For he WILL be the best.

...even if it is just at mundane games.

* * *

Well?!

What do you people think?!

Reviews are a welcome surprise. Please leave one.


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